Hrithik Roshan wannabe Nakuul Mehta (the extra ‘u’ is so unkuul) plays Shekhar, a supremely annoying sort who yackety-yaks non-stop. When a girl in a party asks him to sing, he begins strumming a guitar in the very next shot…you get the drift. He also likes making fun of his friend who comes to drop him off at the railway station, calling him fat and ugly, and likes comparing women to a laptop (don’t ask).

Once at the station, he sees a Sanjana Sharma on the passengers list and proclaims that he’ll be sitting next to her and she’ll be the prettiest girl in the entire station (not universe?). Cut to a girl sitting a-la-Kajol, glasses perched on her uppity nose which is buried in a book, with when this bothersome gent goes to her and (is he a psychic or psycho) confidently calls out ‘Sanjana?’. When they finally board the train, of course with seats next to each other, he sticks to her like glue. How she can stand him we’ve no clue.

While on the train, Shekhar teases unknown women with a ‘hi gorgeous’, and help some children who come begging with an impromptu song performance that collects a neat sum. Also, in a scene that can be succinctly described as bizarre, our man jumps off a moving train to collect some salad straight from a field because a Bengali lady co-passenger, whose dialogues are peppered with at least one ‘bhalo’ per sentence, is fasting. He keeps saying ‘magic’ after such deeds and you wonder when he can do a disappearing act. He laughs and smiles so much your jaws hurt just watching, but Sanjana’s beginning to get mildly impressed.

However, in flashbacks, we learn that Sanjana is in love with a Rohit (Adhyayan Suman), who we are told was maha upset with her once when she wouldn’t eat cake on his birthday because it was her Janmashtami fast. But they patched up when he also became a Krishna bhakt and promised to read the Bhagvat Gita. Conveniently, just when she’s beginning to soften towards Shekhar, she misses the train at a station and guess who decides to miss the train as well. Then in true Jab We Met style, Shekhar, whose devotion borders on being creepy, and Sanjana hire a cab to race for the train. A few silly twists make up the rest of the soulless story.

There’s an attempt to incorporate comedy all over but the humour, if one may call it that, comes in the form of situations like Shekhar picking up a bag from a seat and accidentally pulling a commuter’s saree pallu. The scene immortalised by Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge—that of a moving train and a protagonist running after it—has been put to use here, but with not much effect.

Kajol and Ajay Devgan offer solidarity by appearing rather suddenly in a song and disappearing equally abruptly.

Of the cast, Amita Pathak is pretty in a girl-next-door kind of way with lovely eyes. Of the three newcomers, she’s the most restrained and likeable performer, but she needs to shift focus to her styling and looks as well. She plays a fashion designer and wears the most unforgivably unimaginative clothes with out-of-fashion hair. Adhyayan is passable. Nakuul incorporates too much ‘herogiri’ in his mannerisms.

Technically, the film is average. The sound designing is devoid of any ambient sounds, whether the scene is taking place on a road or at a busy railway station. But that’s a given in most of our films rather than the exception. The songs are the highlight of the film and comprise a variety (result of multiple composers) like the soulful title track Haal-e-dil and the danceable Agg lage aaj kal de fashion nu.

The film is a disappointment from the first frame till last. Try their music album instead.